This one reveals a narrative weakness because it requires backstory. But I trust you'll forgive me this one time, since my weblog is usually so strong on narrative coherence. Oh yes it is. Don't look at me like that.
Schmutzie: You know, I feel like more coffee.
Palinode: A fine idea.
Schmutzie: I think I'll make some, if it's available.
Palinode: I look forward to a nice cup of available coffee.
Palinode: I cleaned the kitchen.
Schmutzie: That's awesome. [It certainly is.]
Palinode: So now there is no obstacle to the making of available coffee.
Schmutzie: As soon as I finish putting photographs of flowers on Flickr, I'll go make available coffee.
Schmutzie: It turns out we only have unavailable coffee.
Palinode: Ah, that's a shame.
Schmutzie: It's crunchier than the available stuff.
Palinode: Therefore you would say that smoothness is an essential property of availability?
Schmutzie: Married women are really crunchy, for example.
Palinode: Yet they are smooth for their husbands?
Palinode: This is sounding like a really stupid Socratic dialogue.
Schmutzie: HA! [Someday I will tell you about the first time I ever heard the HA! of Schmutzie. It was loud and unexpected and right in my face. We were just a couple of young punks at the time.]
Palinode: First he'd ask a slave about smooth rich availability. ['Richness' is an attendant property of 'smoothness,' so availability is necessarily rich as well as smooth.]
Schmutzie: I think he talked to slaves just because he knew he'd be smarter than them.
Palinode: And then he'd turn to his friend and say, "So, Herakleon, you see that a slave understands how smooth availability is, so you must accept it as well". And Herakleon would say "I sure do, Socrates!"
Schmutzie: Nobody ever argued with Socrates.
Palinode: And then he'd blow their minds by singing "November Rain".