interview with a cruller that starts strangely and degenerates from there

(Bumper graphic for ‘Talk Good Lunchtime’. Transition to studio, where Interviewer is looking at a cruller on the guest chair)

Interviewer: Hi all, we cruller now have on chair. Me he lunch?

Cruller: No, no lunch you me, I free agent.

Interviewer: Who come how that, you food, you?

Cruller: The shit. What say that?

Int: You go. Now you go.

Cruller: Skaagh. So cold you, I scratch.

Int: No! Bad to scratch! End of smear you glaze!

Cruller: The leather.

Int: Shriek!

(Cut to commercial)