Evening as always. Schmutzie posed in the bathroom doorway, fetchingly backlit.
Palinode: Those are nice pants.
Schmutzie: Thank you.
Palinode: When did you get those pants? Those are great pants.
Schmutzie: I've had them for a while. (Demurely) They're slimming.
Palinode: (Resists urge to say, "They're sliming?", because he used to work for a guy who drank a Chinese herbal tea called, in a spectular example of Engrish packaging, 'Sliming Tea'.) They're effective.
Schmutzie: They do the job.
Palinode: They should be promoted.
Schmutzie: What do pants get promoted to?
Palinode: Oh... management.
Schmutzie: Administrative duties?
Palinode: Pants... management... yeah.
Palinode: That's the problem with the pants system. High-performing pants get promoted out of the field.
Schmutzie: Hence all the fuschia stirrup pants still in circulation.