Heh. Double Discovery ice cream. I think I just hit on my way to my first million. Or a shallow grave in the desert. Can't figure out which yet.
On to the stuff I intended to talk about.
I made two discoveries tonight (three, if you count the ice cream thing). I discovered that there are two ways to do a crossword puzzle at a bar. The first way is to find a table in a corner and work on a crossword at your own pace with a beer or two. The second way is to gang up on Nick and shout answers at him. This tactic reduces conversation to the following:
"Eight letters, starts with M, showy flower. Marigold! It's marigold! What else is it going to be? What's 49 down? Okay, what's 34 across? That'll prove it. What the hell is this? Stop writing over the numbers, we can't see! What did you write down there? It's reggae! What else would it be? Jamaican music, six letters. What did you put down? Well it isn't Raggadeth, that's for sure! What's 22 down?" And so on.
My second discovery - or quiet realization, if you like - was that, at age fifteen, I could not imagine being twenty years old. Now I'm twenty years older than fifteen, and I'm still laughing at all the stupid terms for puking that we came up with back then. In fact I think they may be funnier now. Talking to Ralph on the big white telephone? Funny. Or Ralph and his Amazing Technicolour Yawn? It was red and yellow and blue and green and violet and black and purple and pink...
Okay, enough about the discoveries. I'm really into this Double Discovery Ice Cream thing. What would you discover in it? Are there already flavours that qualify for the Double Discovery brand? There's butterscotch ripple, but since the discovery of the butterscotch and ripple usually coincides, I would consider it disqualified. And there's Tiger Tiger, but it seems like a real cheat to discover two of the same thing. And once you discover the first tiger you're not really concerned with finding the second. One's enough. Coicidentally, that was part of the original marketing campaign for Tiger Tiger ice cream - Treat Yourself to a Second Tiger, Even Though One Is Generally Enough, Especially When They Pin You With Their Powerful Forelimbs and Maul Your Face and Take Your Wallet. They dropped that slogan pretty quickly. I mean, it didn't even make sense.