your metathesis and caps lock dollars at work

Hey, you know what's not exciting? Somebody else's IM conversations!

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schmutzie has invited you to install Gmail voice and video chat. Get started with video

me: Is you there?

schmutzie: Yup. I don't know how I called you up.

schmutzie has invited you to install Gmail voice and video chat. Get started with video

me: Me neither. You keep inviting me to install Gmail voice and video chat.

Learn more

schmutzie: Oh, yeah. I was inviting you to Google's new voice and video chat functions.

me: I thought maybe Onion was doing it.

schmutzie: No. He's sleeping with his feet under my butt.

me: Mmm. Butt-warmed feet. Say, I just tried to call you on the cellular telephone, but you were not answering.

schmutzie: It's off and plugged in. I am going to go start doing some work on organizing our office.

me: Do you want to wait for my strong hands and manly legs to come home and help with that?

schmutzie: I'll do what I can until then. I'm going for a stiff pint after work. I don't care if it's cold. Work! Ha! I meant after I do all this getting myself organizized to actually do work in the office with this new computer and talking to possible work peoples including desing.

me: Desing? YOU'LL HAVE TO SPEAK UP, I'M BUSY DESING.

schmutzie: That's what Design used to be back in the days of hrosses and wapses.

me: Don't forget the brids.

schmutzie: And the flutterbys.

me: And the holemans.

schmutzie: molehans?

me: No.

schmutzie: Out with it.

me: HOLD ON A MOMENT, I'M DESING. Manholes.

schmutzie: Want to meet me when you're done work?

me: DAMN, THEY JUST BROUGHT IN AN ENTIRE DESING CREW. IT'S REALLY NOISY IN HERE. Sure, I'd love to.

schmutzie: I'LL TRY NOT TO BE DESING THERE

me: DON'T DES AND DRIVE.

schmutzie: DESING IS NO LAUGHING MATTER.

me: TO DES IS HUMAN. TO FORGIVE IS RIDICULOUS BECAUSE DESING IS SO HEINOUS.

gmail invites you to shut up already